Evan spent the rest of the dozing in and out of consciousness. He slept until one in the afternoon the following day, although he didn’t get out of bed until two thirty. He didn’t make it far from his bed either; he ended up on the couch and proceeded to get high. It had become his morning ritual, just as a business man would purchase his coffee during his commute to the office, Evan would commute across his apartment to the couch and get high. He sat there dissatisfied, he was angry at his past self for not saving enough drugs for the morning. Evan needed more; he searched all of his pockets and all he had found was a crumpled up five dollar bill. This was not going to be enough for the day which meant that Evan was going to have to go to work.

Evan’s addiction had become more demanding than a full time job. He worked day and night all week in order to support his habit. He checked his bank account in hopes that some money had been deposited into his account accidently; instead all he saw were zeros. Evan had never stolen from strangers to pay for his drugs; he preyed on those who loved him unconditionally, his family. It was at this moment he remembered the voicemail he had received a night earlier. Evan was going to visit home; he was going to manipulate his mother into giving him money. He knew this was going to work because it always worked. His mother loved him so dearly that she could not stand to see her son suffer. These were facts that Evan learned early on in his addiction.

Evan had never seen anything wrong with manipulating his family into giving him money. The only reason they had started to give him money was to prevent him from stealing from them. Knowing that within a few short hours he would have all the money he needed for his drugs dressed himself hastily. It was if he had been jolted back to life, he felt the adrenaline course through him and this drove him as he set out towards his mother’s house. He had debated with himself if he was going to call his mom before his arrival or not. He decided not to call, because if he did she may have time to change her mind. This was all part of his plan; he would show up unannounced in hopes that his mother would acquiesce to his needs.

The journey was a forty five minute train ride. Evan still felt a lingering buzz as he exited the train station. He lit his last cigarette and proceeded to walk towards his childhood home. Evan did not like being back in this neighborhood because it was a very small town and more often than not he would run into someone he knew. He stared at the sidewalk a few steps in front of him in order to hide from the world. He was consumed with fear that someone from his past would see him and he would have to lie to them about his life. Evan did not look up until he was right at the front door of his childhood home. He took out his keys and proceeded to open the door. He was expecting to have a feeling of relief knowing that he would be able to afford his drugs for the day shortly, but he couldn’t feel a thing as he stepped inside.

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